Do you and your husband have arguments…Yes?…Ok good, so do we. Before kids, we had the time to argue/discuss whatever and whenever. After kids…er….not so much.
First: There are two categories of arguments. 1) Things you can argue about in front of your kids like where to go for dinner or (husband) don’t leave your shoes on the floor, etc. 2) Things you shouldn’t argue about in front of your kids like finances, family and kid problems, etc.
Second: If you argue in front of your kids, be respectful of the other person. I honestly think it’s important to teach our children conflict management, but if the subject becomes too heated, table it and say, “couch time”.
Couch time: Couch time is the code word my husband and I use when we need to talk/argue about something later. If one of us says “couch time”, we know after the kids go to bed, we will turn off all electronic devices and sit on opposite couches and then argue about whatever we left from earlier. It prevents us from stuffing our problems; instead, we’re tabling them to protect our children from adult conversations.
Side note: A marriage counselor is the most beneficial thing you can do to improve your marriage and reconnect with your spouse.